Give the awkward kid a compliment.

rafi-dangelo:

I was the ring bearer for my sister’s wedding when I was like 11 or 12 years old, and though I wasn’t exactly shy, I was kind of awkward and a little nerdy in new situations.  During the rehearsal, I did my part just fine, but just before the second take, the wedding planner said, “You have such a beautiful smile!  Make sure you smile this time, okay?”

I’ve battled with depression and low self-esteem off & on for most of my life, but even at my lowest points when I literally hated everything about myself and how I look, I still remembered that lady telling me I had a beautiful smile.

You never know what memories someone will take with them from childhood through adulthood, both good and bad.  I remember the bullying I got because I wasn’t straight, but I also remember that wedding rehearsal being the first time I didn’t feel like the ugly kid.

It’s good to focus on achievements and helping kids develop interests, but they still live in the real world, and society will always see what you look like before they see what you have to offer.  A little bit of validation can go a long way, and a genuine compliment for the shy awkward kid can really make a lasting impression.